Monday, February 15, 2010

Oh Brother!

Dealing with "Bothers" and Sisters


When I saw the title of this I just had laugh.  Our previous Youth Pastor always referred to siblings as "blisters" (sisters) and "bothers" (brothers).  Of course he was joking, but the point was made.  It's sad to say, but siblings don't get along perfectly all the time (imagine that!!!!!).  

I'll give you a quick example of situations.  Last year we had 4 foster girls (on top of our already 6 children) which put our family at 9 girls and 1 boy all 15 and under.  Talk about hormones!  All of them were homeschooled by my mom and it was dead in the middle of winter (that seemed to never let up).  I tell ya, we were bored, sick and tired of each other and about ready to pull each others hair out (inside joke, just bear with me).  This was the perfect situation to just all about "go at" each other.  I think sometimes just changing the situation will help.  If you can help in any way change what everyone is doing (like as in, we were all closed in together with nothing other than schoolwork and pick on each other, so Dad packed us all up for the weekend and we had a little family vacation) DO IT!  When we got back from our little vacation, everyone was in much better spirits and had a better outlook on things.  Now, you can do something way smaller such as all the kids are about ready to drive you balistic (they are being loud, annoying, obnoxious, etc) give them something to do.  Bring them outside, read them a book, tell them a story, etc.  Set aside your pride and selfeshness and help address the problem!

Just to let you know...I'm talking right to myself.  I need to remember all the time!  Currently having 3 brothers 9 and under, yeah it gets a little crazy.  Sometimes I'm just about ready to blow up but I've gotta remember, think about them, not myself.  I've gotta learn to respond with humility and patience.    Okay...putting that on my mental list. :)  Always lots to learn!


We all have things that bother us... maybe it's when 2 siblings (my sisters!) are running through the house singing at the VERY TOP OF THEIR LUNGS (they claim that they're praising Jesus!), or when you've got a younger brother that TRYS to purposely do every little thing to BUG you?!? My goodness, life can be full of little things that are BOTHERING us, but how are WE responding to the irritations? It comes back to our heart again

If our siblings are "bothering" us, than maybe we're looking at them as pests instead of friends?
We all know that if we respond and say "STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!! You're driving my CrAZy! WOn't you just quit it?????????????" they get that wonderful reaction that they had (possibly) hoped for and everything explodes.

 What happens if we say something kind to them, encouraging, helpful? Then we don't get angry and {hopefully} they'll stop whatever they're doing to be annoying! Maybe you're getting easily offended? GIVE UP YOUR RIGHTS and PRIDE!
If things continue to escalate, than go to your mom and dad for help INSTEAD of fighting - the perfect change to practice humility, right?

Just a few tips on what to do with a bothering sibling:
1. Accept this irritation as from the Lord
2. Examine yourself for what you may h ave done to cause this irritation.
3. Determine what you can learn through this irritation.
4. See his/her need.
5. View this as a test from the Lord.

Stephen's Definitions
Anger - Just one letter short of danger.
Self-Control - Something that comes in mightly handy when you're eating salted peanuts.
Temperance - A trait learned from a tea kettle - though it's up to it's neck in hot water, it continues to sing.
Peace - The period of confusion and unrest between two wars.
Patience - The art of concealing your impatience.
Cooperation - Doing what I tell you and doing it quickly.

Do any of you have examples to share of situations/ways that you have irritations in your life? :)

~Bethany and Jenna~


Kelsey Anne Hoppman said...

Wonderful post! I needed that reminder to respond correctly to some of the situations mentioned. You think you learn something only needing to be reminded of it again! :)
God Bless,

Charity said...

That makes me think about that... I will try!
As always, I love Stephen's definitions - what a laugh!! :)
God bless!

Bethany's Dad said...

Glad to hear Dads weren't referred to as Duds. I love you.